I realise that “self-care” is bandied about quite often but I think so few of us really practice it in a way that is healthy.
I’m the first to admit that I don’t think the way I do self-care is ideal. Let me explain.
We all have issues – things that upset us, that makes us mad, that trigger us (I separated those things because I believe that people forget they are not the same. That is a completely separate post I have brewing.)
These last few months, maybe even longer, I’ve noticed myself pulling back further and further from things that I find distressing or harmful to my mental health. This means less news, less twitter, less tumblr, less getting engaged in any and all social media, I even find myself refusing to engage in person on things that are too sensitive for me.
After everything I’ve dealt with, am dealing with still, over the last few years – my health, rape, work, etc. – I don’t have room in my head or my heart to take on the extra stress. To fight the good fight as it were. I see people on social media who run headlong into the muck and mire day after day and I don’t know how they don’t burnout or break under the weight of the crap that comes their way.
In order to keep going, to keep putting one foot in front of the other I need to look at puppies and shut out a lot of the ugliness in the world. I am not unaware of it by any means but I find my life is a lot more headlines than in-depth stories. I don’t want the graphic details. I realise there’s a lot of privilege in this approach. I can bury my head in the sand and pretend the horrific details don’t exist.
I won’t always be this way – but right now – caring for me, making sure I’m functioning as well as I can is how I cope.
Pluie et vent sur Aurore 
Maybe with things being less raw and so many more positives in your work life you are trying to stay more positive and not dwell on the events that were so traumatizing without even doing it deliberately. You don’t want to let the bad ruin your life.
When I think back I can see stupid actions – I can’t believe that I was so naive and unperceptive. (not saying that you were). Sounds like a healthy tack you are taking.
Thank you.
I think some times I need to be reminded that this choice – to focus on the good – is what’s best for me and it’s healthy.
Whatever works for you, Aurore. What. Ever. Works. Do it, stay calm, and preserve your inner peace. I can relate to this approach. My first response was to stay and fight but over time I realized it was a losing battle and my peace of mind was the largest “casualty” and te only one that mattered. Starting with just a vacation from all of the noise and negativity of social media is a great start. Now, I find comfort in unfollowing, blocking, muting, anything that may trigger or just annoy me.
You’ll find more time to read, relax, spend time with yourself and love ones who are near. The anxiety has left and I’m finding better ways to stay in touch with friends. And, while burying your head in the sand is a quick fix and short reprieve from all of the noise–angry noise online, you’ll need the comfort of friends. A healthy exchange with people you care about is good for your soul. And it will help cheer you up. All in time, sweetheart.
Sending you good vibes and wishing you all the best in life.
xox
Sometimes I think I’m taking the easy way out. Why don’t I get in the fray and fight? Others do it.
Then I think about the struggles I have and how much happy and easier they are when I can focus on them and the good that is coming my way.
xoxo Darling!